Trash Talk

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:19-21 NIV

A year ago I had a difficult experience: some valuables of mine were accidentally thrown away while I was at work (I will not elaborate on details so don’t ask). It was perfectly orchestrated… I just missed the person who threw it away, and then they just missed the garbage truck that dumped a large amount of trash in his truck. I was heartbroken and desperate to try and recover my valuables. I was able to get in touch with the landfill, and they informed the driver so that he would let us know when he was arriving.

I never knew how overwhelming being at a landfill would be, but I had hope that I could recover a piece of my belongings. I went to a store and got some pants and gloves and my friend gave me a shirt. I listened to the safety instructions and prepared to work. As I was waiting for the truck at the landfill the lady at the front desk spoke to me. She began to tell her story of how she lost everything in a house fire and the only thing left was the same item I was there searching for. I thought it was very ironic that the only thing she recovered was the item I had taken away from me.

My husband met me at the landfill ready to get dirty and help me. There is a whole different level of love when someone is willing to be knee deep in other people’s trash just to support and care for you, but that is a different story.

So, the truck arrives at the site, and we pull around to where they unload the trash. The smell was overwhelming and the amount of trash was more than I could have imagined.

The summer heat was drying my tears as they ran down my cheeks. The garbage man told me where in that massive amount of trash it should be. We start digging hoping to see signs of my belongings. We began to see some items from where I work and I began to get hopeful, but as I moved the trash more and more stuff becomes unraveled. It was becoming more clear to me that this was searching for a needle in a haystack.

The men at the landfill got their gloves on and stood right by me and tried to help dig as I explained what it looked like. The amount of kindness and love they showed to me was truly God sent.

Hours went by and the smell and heat became all too overwhelming. I began to accept the fate of my items. My husband and I decided to call the search off and go home. I cried the whole way home mourning the loss of my precious things.

I came home and took five showers but could still smell the landfill. I tried to eat but even my food smelled like the landfill and I became nauseous.

I found out later that the men kept looking for my lost item for a while after I left. I wish I had some beautiful ending with my item being recovered but that isn’t the case. I knew God could perform a miracle, but I think he knew something in me had to change and that change was worth the sacrifice.

I woke up the next day feeling the loss greater than ever. All I knew to do was run it off (side note: I’m not normally a runner unless I’m being chased) and pray. While I was praying God spoke to me. He asked me to imagine all my valuables thrown away or lost in a fire. He then asked me a question, “What do you have left?”

I realized in that moment God was pointing out that I have Him and my faith which can never be taken away. I have my family to make more memories with and unbeknownst to me, I had a little one growing inside me. He knew the blessing to come.

As we go through the trials, if we seek Him through the trial we can see Him and experience joy.

“Don’t let your happiness depend on something you may lose.” C. S. Lewis

“Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them. The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever.” 1 John 2:15, 17 NIV